第10节（第451-500行） (10/20)

ifmenwishtogiveunlimitedpowertotheirfellow-man,theymustkeephimseparatedfromordinaryhumanity;theymustsurroundhimwithacontinualworship,and,byaconstantceremonial,keepupforhimthesuperhumanparttheyhavegrantedhim.ourmasterscannotremainabsolute,exceptonconditionofbeingtreatedasidols.

but,afterall,theseidolsaremen,and,iftheexclusivelifetheymustleadisaninsulttothedignityofothers,itisalsoatormenttothemselves.everyoneknowsthelawofthespanishcourt,whichusedtoregulate,hourbyhour,theactionsofthekingandqueen;"sothat,"

saysvoltaire,"byreadingitonecantellallthatthesovereignsofspainhavedone,orwilldo,fromphilipiitothedayofjudgment."itwasbythislawthatphilipiii,whensick,wasobligedtoenduresuchanexcessofheatthathediedinconsequence,becausethedukeofuzeda,whoalonehadtherighttoputoutthefireintheroyalchamber,happenedtobeabsent.

whenthewifeofcharlesiiwasrunawaywithonaspiritedhorse,shewasabouttoperishbeforeanyonedaredtosaveher,becauseetiquetteforbadethemtotouchthequeen.twoyoungofficersendangeredtheirlivesforherbystoppingthehorse.theprayersandtearsofherwhomtheyhadjustsnatchedfromdeathwerenecessarytoobtainpardonfortheircrime.everyoneknowstheanecdoterelatedbymadamecampanofmarieantoinette,wifeoflouisxvi.oneday,beingathertoilet,whenthechemisewasabouttobepresentedtoherbyoneoftheassistants,aladyofveryancientfamilyenteredandclaimedthehonor,asshehadtherightbyetiquette;but,atthemomentshewasabouttofulfilherduty,aladyofhigherrankappeared,andinherturntookthegarmentshewasabouttooffertothequeen;whenathirdladyofstillhighertitlecameinherturn,andwasfollowedbyafourth,whowasnootherthanthekingssister.thechemisewasinthismannerpassedfromhandtohand,withceremonies,courtesies,andcompliments,beforeitcametothequeen,who,halfnakedandquiteashamed,wasshiveringwithcoldforthegreathonorofetiquette.

12th,sevenoclock,p.m——oncominghomethisevening,isaw,standingatthedoorofahouse,anoldman,whoseappearanceandfeaturesremindedmeofmyfather.therewasthesamebeautifulsmile,thesamedeepandpenetratingeye,thesamenoblebearingofthehead,andthesamecarelessattitude.

ibeganlivingoveragainthefirstyearsofmylife,andrecallingtomyselftheconversationsofthatguidewhomgodinhismercyhadgivenme,andwhominhisseverityhehadtoosoonwithdrawn.

whenmyfatherspoke,itwasnotonlytobringourtwomindstogetherbyaninterchangeofthought,buthiswordsalwayscontainedinstruction.

notthatheendeavoredtomakemefeelitso:myfatherfearedeverythingthathadtheappearanceofalesson.heusedtosaythatvirtuecouldmakeherselfdevotedfriends,butshedidnottakepupils:thereforehewasnotdesiroustoteachgoodness;hecontentedhimselfwithsowingtheseedsofit,certainthatexperiencewouldmakethemgrow.

howoftenhasgoodgrainfallenthusintoacorneroftheheart,and,whenithasbeenlongforgotten,allatonceputforththebladeandcomeintoear!itisatreasurelaidasideinatimeofignorance,andwedonotknowitsvaluetillwefindourselvesinneedofit.

amongthestorieswithwhichheenlivenedourwalksorourevenings,thereisonewhichnowreturnstomymemory,doubtlessbecausethetimeiscometoderiveitslessonfromit.

myfather,whowasapprenticedattheageoftwelvetooneofthosetradingcollectorswhocallthemselvesnaturalists,becausetheyputallcreationunderglassesthattheymaysellitbyretail,hadalwaysledalifeofpovertyandlabor.obligedtorisebeforedaybreak,byturnsshop-boy,clerk,andlaborer,hewasmadetobearalonealltheworkofatradeofwhichhismasterreapedalltheprofits.intruth,thislatterhadapeculiartalentformakingthemostofthelaborofotherpeople.

thoughunfithimselffortheexecutionofanykindofwork,nooneknewbetterhowtosellit.hiswordswereanet,inwhichpeoplefoundthemselvestakenbeforetheywereaware.andsincehewasdevotedtohimselfalone,andlookedontheproducerashisenemy,andthebuyerasprey,heusedthembothwiththatobstinateperseverancewhichavariceteaches.

myfatherwasaslavealltheweek,andcouldcallhimselfhisownonlyonsunday.themasternaturalist,whousedtospendthedayatthehouseofanoldfemalerelative,thengavehimhislibertyonconditionthathedinedout,andathisownexpense.butmyfatherusedsecretlytotakewithhimacrustofbread,whichhehidinhisbotanizing-box,and,leavingparisassoonasitwasday,hewouldwanderfarintothevalleyofmontmorency,thewoodofmeudon,oramongthewindingsofthemarne.

excitedbythefreshair,thepenetratingperfumeofthegrowingvegetation,orthefragranceofthehoneysuckles,hewouldwalkonuntilhungerorfatiguemadeitselffelt.thenhewouldsitunderahedge,orbythesideofastream,andwouldmakearusticfeast,byturnsonwatercresses,woodstrawberries,andblackberriespickedfromthehedges;hewouldgatherafewplants,readafewpagesofflorian,theningreatestvogue,ofgessner,whowasjusttranslated,orofjeanjacques,ofwhomhepossessedthreeoldvolumes.thedaywasthuspassedalternatelyinactivityandrest,inpursuitandmeditation,untilthedecliningsunwarnedhimtotakeagaintheroadtoparis,wherehewouldarrive,hisfeettornanddusty,buthismindinvigoratedforawholeweek.

oneday,ashewasgoingtowardthewoodofviroflay,hemet,closetoit,astrangerwhowasoccupiedinbotanizingandinsortingtheplantshehadjustgathered.hewasanelderlymanwithanhonestface;buthiseyes,whichwereratherdeep-setunderhiseyebrows,hadasomewhatuneasyandtimidexpression.hewasdressedinabrownclothcoat,agraywaistcoat,blackbreeches,andworstedstockings,andheldanivory-headedcaneunderhisarm.hisappearancewasthatofasmallretiredtradesmanwhowaslivingonhismeans,andratherbelowthegoldenmeanofhorace.

myfather,whohadgreatrespectforage,civillyraisedhishattohimashepassed.indoingso,aplantheheldfellfromhishand;thestrangerstoopedtotakeitup,andrecognizedit.

"itisadeutariaheptaphyllos,"saidhe;"ihavenotyetseenanyoftheminthesewoods;didyoufinditnearhere,sir?"

myfatherrepliedthatitwastobefoundinabundanceonthetopofthehill,towardsevres,aswellasthegreatlaserpitium.

"that,too!"repeatedtheoldmanmorebriskly."ah!ishallgoandlookforthem;ihavegatheredthemformerlyonthehillsideofrobaila."

myfatherproposedtotakehim.thestrangeracceptedhisproposalwiththanks,andhastenedtocollecttogethertheplantshehadgathered;butallofasuddenheappearedseizedwithascruple.heobservedtohiscompanionthattheroadhewasgoingwashalfwayupthehill,andledinthedirectionofthecastleofthedamesroyalesatbellevue;thatbygoingtothetophewouldconsequentlyturnoutofhisroad,andthatitwasnotrightheshouldtakethistroubleforastranger.

myfatherinsisteduponitwithhishabitualgood-nature;but,themoreeagernessheshowed,themoreobstinatelytheoldmanrefused;itevenseemedtomyfatherthathisgoodintentionatlastexcitedhissuspicion.hethereforecontentedhimselfwithpointingouttheroadtothestranger,whomhesaluted,andhesoonlostsightofhim.

manyhourspassedby,andhethoughtnomoreofthemeeting.hehadreachedthecopsesofchaville,where,stretchedonthegroundinamossyglade,hereadoncemorethelastvolumeofemile.thedelightofreadingithadsocompletelyabsorbedhimthathehadceasedtoseeorhearanythingaroundhim.withhischeeksflushedandhiseyesmoist,herepeatedaloudapassagewhichhadparticularlyaffectedhim.

anexclamationutteredclosebyhimawokehimfromhisecstasy;heraisedhishead,andperceivedthetradesman-lookingpersonhehadmetbeforeonthecrossroadatviroflay.

hewasloadedwithplants,thecollectionofwhichseemedtohaveputhimintohighgood-humor.

"athousandthanks,sir,"saidhetomyfather."ihavefoundallthatyoutoldmeof,andiamindebtedtoyouforacharmingwalk."

myfatherrespectfullyrose,andmadeacivilreply.thestrangerhadgrownquitefamiliar,andevenaskedifhisyoung"brotherbotanist"didnotthinkofreturningtoparis.myfatherrepliedintheaffirmative,andopenedhistinboxtoputhisbookbackinit.

thestrangeraskedhimwithasmileifhemightwithoutimpertinenceaskthenameofit.myfatheransweredthatitwasrousseausemile.

thestrangerimmediatelybecamegrave.

theywalkedforsometimesidebyside,myfatherexpressing,withthewarmthofaheartstillthrobbingwithemotion,allthatthisworkhadmadehimfeel;hiscompanionremainingcoldandsilent.theformerextolledthegloryofthegreatgenevesewriter,whosegeniushadmadehimacitizenoftheworld;heexpatiatedonthisprivilegeofgreatthinkers,whoreigninspiteoftimeandspace,andgathertogetherapeopleofwillingsubjectsoutofallnations;butthestrangersuddenlyinterruptedhim:

"andhowdoyouknow,"saidhe,mildly,"whetherjeanjacqueswouldnotexchangethereputationwhichyouseemtoenvyforthelifeofoneofthewood-cutterswhosechimneyssmokewesee?whathasfamebroughthimexceptpersecution?theunknownfriendswhomhisbooksmayhavemadeforhimcontentthemselveswithblessinghimintheirhearts,whilethedeclaredenemiesthattheyhavedrawnuponhimpursuehimwithviolenceandcalumny!hispridehasbeenflatteredbysuccess:howmanytimeshasitbeenwoundedbysatire?andbeassuredthathumanprideislikethesybaritewhowaspreventedfromsleepingbyacreaseinaroseleaf.theactivityofavigorousmind,bywhichtheworldprofits,almostalwaysturnsagainsthimwhopossessesit.heexpectsmorefromitashegrowsolder;theidealhepursuescontinuallydisgustshimwiththeactual;heislikeamanwho,withatoo-refinedsight,discernsspotsandblemishesinthemostbeautifulface.iwillnotspeakofstrongertemptationsandofdeeperdownfalls.genius,youhavesaid,isakingdom;butwhatvirtuousmanisnotafraidofbeingaking?hewhofeelsonlyhisgreatpowers,is——withtheweaknessesandpassionsofournature——preparingforgreatfailures.believeme,sir,theunhappymanwhowrotethisbookisnoobjectofadmirationorofenvy;but,ifyouhaveafeelingheart,pityhim!"

myfather,astonishedattheexcitementwithwhichhiscompanionpronouncedtheselastwords,didnotknowwhattoanswer.

justthentheyreachedthepavedroadwhichledfrommeudoncastletothatofversailles;acarriagewaspassing.

theladieswhowereinitperceivedtheoldman,utteredanexclamationofsurprise,andleaningoutofthewindowrepeated:

"thereisjeanjacques——thereisrousseau!"

thenthecarriagedisappearedinthedistance.

myfatherremainedmotionless,confounded,andamazed,hiseyeswideopen,andhishandsclasped.

rousseau,whohadshudderedonhearinghisnamespoken,turnedtowardhim:

"yousee,"saidhe,withthebittermisanthropywhichhislatermisfortuneshadproducedinhim,"jeanjacquescannotevenhidehimself:

heisanobjectofcuriositytosome,ofmalignitytoothers,andtoallheisapublicthing,atwhichtheypointthefinger.itwouldsignifylessifhehadonlytosubmittotheimpertinenceoftheidle;but,assoonasamanhashadthemisfortunetomakehimselfaname,hebecomespublicproperty.everyonerakesintohislife,relateshismosttrivialactions,andinsultshisfeelings;hebecomeslikethosewalls,whicheverypasser-bymaydefacewithsomeabusivewriting.perhapsyouwillsaythatihavemyselfencouragedthiscuriositybypublishingmyconfessions.buttheworldforcedmetoit.theylookedintomyhousethroughtheblinds,andtheyslanderedme;ihaveopenedthedoorsandwindows,sothattheyshouldatleastknowmesuchasiam.adieu,sir.

wheneveryouwishtoknowtheworthoffame,rememberthatyouhaveseenrousseau."

nineoclock——ah!nowiunderstandmyfathersstory!itcontainstheanswertooneofthequestionsiaskedmyselfaweekago.yes,inowfeelthatfameandpoweraregiftsthataredearlybought;andthat,whentheydazzlethesoul,bothareoftenest,asmadamedestaelsays,butundeuileclatantdebonheur!

tisbettertobelowlyborn,andrangewithhumbleliversincontent,thantobeperkdupinaglisteringgrief,andwearagoldensorrow.

[henryviii.,actii.,scene3.]

CHAPTER

VIII

misanthropyandrepentance

august3d,nineoclockp.m.

therearedayswheneverythingappearsgloomytous;theworld,likethesky,iscoveredbyadarkfog.nothingseemsinitsplace;weseeonlymisery,improvidence,andcruelty;theworldseemswithoutgod,andgivenuptoalltheevilsofchance.

yesterdayiwasinthisunhappyhumor.afteralongwalkinthefaubourgs,ireturnedhome,sadanddispirited.

everythingihadseenseemedtoaccusethecivilizationofwhichwearesoproud!ihadwanderedintoalittleby-street,withwhichiwasnotacquainted,andifoundmyselfsuddenlyinthemiddleofthosedreadfulabodeswherethepoorareborn,tolanguishanddie.ilookedatthosedecayingwalls,whichtimehascoveredwithafoulleprosy;thosewindows,fromwhichdirtyragshangouttodry;thosefetidgutters,whichcoilalongthefrontsofthehouseslikevenomousreptiles!